Our All Time Favorite Thieves

In the days of old, they locked their doors or turned the sheriff loose on thieves. These days, we need identity theft protection to protect us from the most nefarious criminals of our day.

History and legend alike are replete with examples of outlaws who have won our hearts. In some cases, it was because they committed their crimes to benefit the poor and downtrodden. In other cases, it may simply be that we wish we had the guts to do what they do. In any case, here is our list of our XX favorite thieves of all time:

1. Robin Hood. The noble outlaw of England’s Sherwood Forrest robbed from the rich and gave to the poor, displaying amazing acts of daring do and unthinkable skill with the English longbow in the process. Together with his band of merry men, Robin Hood claims the top spot of our all time favorite thieves.
2. Bilbo Baggins. The original hobbit, Bilbo Baggins took his turn at thievery when he stole the ring from Golem’s cave while on his way to slay the dragon Smaug. What ensues is perhaps the best trilogy in the history of mankind.
3. Bonnie and Clyde. There are bank robbers, and then there are bank robbers. Bonnie and Clyde robbed banks with a swagger and style that just wouldn’t have been possible outside of the 1930s.
4. The Artful Dodger. Never mind the sniveling little orphan brat. The Artful Dodger had style. Not only could he pick a pocket or two, but he could charm the socks off of the lady thieves while doing it.
5. Jesse James. No, not the tattooed knucklehead who works on motorcycles. We mean the real Jesse James. The son of a Baptist preacher, you could say he went astray, but you’d be understating things a bit. Jesse and his brother Frank returned from the Civil War full of piss and vinegar and started a reign of terror that stretched all the way north to Minnesota.
6. Don Corleone. This guy had a sense of honor a mile long, which is what made all of us love The Godfather, even though he was the worst kind of thug in most respects. We thought about leaving him off of this list, but he made us an offer we couldn’t refuse.
7. The identity thief. What’s that? You don’t really like this one? Well, you might as well invite him over to dinner and hand him your credit cards if you don’t have identity theft protection.

Tagged as: best thieves, bonnie and clyde, famous thieves, robin hood